I’m kind feel stuck inside an in-between season where I try to be grateful for where I have been able to get to thus far – while still keeping my eye on things that remain difficult in my life that I hope resolve.

I’m grateful for the steps I’ve taken to remain secure in my career even though many times it was extremely uncomfortable.

I love the person I am which is a feat we all strive to get to.

It’s a relief to finally have moved away from my family and social circle that was drying up over the pandemic because I have new opportunities to meet people and have hope that I’ll find love and belonging in a new place.

It takes courage to bloom.

Difficulties remains no matter where you move to – we all know this. But being able to change my physical location, give myself room and permission to take care of myself and not focus on the needs of others back home, and being able to continue to deeply heal has given me a chance to get to a different level.

I remember telling my therapist a while ago that I felt like a plant that needed a bigger pot for the longest time. I was stuck in freeze response for a many years because I was knocked down by trauma so in a sense I accepted that the small pot was the only thing I could handle most days. But then there were other days I felt trapped where I was; I watched so many people move away or live their lives according to timelines I’ve still not reached and it felt suffocating to stay where I was and feel like nothing was changing.

Wherever you find yourself – I hope more than anything that you have courage. Courage to stick out difficult moments in your life knowing it’s not going to be forever. Courage to change your circumstances if you know deep down they are not serving you. Or maybe even courage to bloom into the person you know you are but have felt disillusioned about for any number of reasons.

I might not see a lot of what I want to grow but I’m trying to bloom anyway.